Around this time, people like to talk about their best whiskies of the year. The ones to buy, remark about another year past and enjoy with family and friends to ring in the next year but just as there is a nice list, there is also a naughty list of those bottom shelf disgraces that you either poured down a drain, created an infinity bottle blend or managed to send samples of to unsuspecting/curious friends that were willing to damage their tongues for science and the community. So, let’s go ahead and kick off this shit-show countdown from 10 down to 1 on 2021’s naughty list to keep away from the ones you love and give to those you don’t. 10. Glenfarclas 30 years- The 25 was so incredible, but yet the 30 did a siren song on the nose that lured me into my doom before laying siege to my tongue with bitter pithy fruit banshee screams. At $500+ for a bottle, there shouldn’t be any banshees in the bottle. 9. Deanston 17-year old Organic 2002 PX finish- A cocktail made out of sweet and sour juices, spent matchsticks and a cinnamon challenge. 8. Loki Icelandic Single Malt- This is almost gag gift level whisky, where you give someone a bag of jelly beans, but they don’t realize that the flavors are actually dung, animal urine-soaked hay and moldy fruits. At least it had a bit of a redeeming finish, but not nearly enough to make up for the smell or taste. 7. Mars Lucky Cat “Mint”- How could a bottle with a picture of a cat and price tag at nearly $1k today betray you? Well, this one did and tasted more like a kitty litter covered homemade grapefruit and lemon sorbet that some cigarette ash fell into when running the ice cream machine. 6. Proper Number Twelve- Do you like sweaty little UFC fighters coming in liquid form to beat the hell out of your tongue? Because that’s what the bottle @ContemplativeFox bought tasted like to me. Number 5-3 goes to the people at LAWS that decided to give the customer a recreation of what uncleaned bathtub whiskey from the prohibition era tasted like. These are whiskies that fall into the D.A.R.E. program and you really should just say “No” to them. 5. LAWS Centennial Straight Wheat- A chamomile tea brewed with bitter pithy fruits, bowling alley funk, and eating vegemite on trash can salvaged stale and moldy whole wheat bread. 4. LAWS Four Grain- Kiddy pool pee water soup that has been boiling on the stove with freshly polished black dress shoes, Apple Jacks cereal, used bandages and kitty litter. 3. LAWS San Luis Valley Rye- Military select knockoff lemon pledge that has been slightly watered-down using pickle juice and used in getting the nasty funk off the hallways in basic training barracks that the First Sergeant just threw his cigarette into. 2. Pure Scot Blend- I’m still not sure if this was a real whisky or not. @ContemplativeFox never let me know if he was tricking me with bottom shelf vodka with a splash of caramel coloring, but that’s what this one tastes like. We are now down to the final and most heinous whiskey of the 2021 shit-list. This goes to none other than: 1. Penderyn 12-year Ruby Cask- This is exactly what Everclear jungle juice baking in the Texas sun in a cask for about 1 year would taste like. Buy this overpriced ($160) bottle only for protection to be used on burglars as a form of mace. Happy holidays everyone and we’ll see what 2022 brings us for the naughty list. Cheers!!!