Tastes
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Sweet but complex nose: root beer, slight grape, brown sugar, vanilla, and white chocolate. But the most prominent, character-defining note (I kid you not) is the white candy stick found in a pouch of Fun Dip. Look it up if you didn't have a childhood; basically a hard sugary vanilla candy. The palate: a lot more vanilla with sweet tobacco, freshly-brewed sweet tea, sweet orange (it's a rather sweet rum), and then banana. This further evolves into mango first, and then plum midpalate, followed by banana candy. The marching development of these flavors is exquisite, and the secondary notes are just like experiencing the flavors of some tropical candy one after the other. There is very little change in the underlying heat or texture, only the flavors. The empty glass has a strong scent of vanilla extract and somehow nothing else, a technological marvel really. I've heard that Zaya used to be a lot better "back in the day", when the bottle had real rope around the neck, etc., and that this version is a terrible representation of its former glory. But if this is what rum past its prime tastes like, then I need to try more rum!31.99 USD per Bottle
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Beefeater London Dry Gin (47%)
London Dry Gin — England
Reviewed June 11, 2019 (edited January 20, 2020)Nose of juniper, lemon peel and oil, and some pepper. soft entry, a salted juniper berry and a lemon dusted with coriander fall quietly onto a bed of pine needles. There is a residual sweetness from just a touch of anise at the end. Beefeater is my current go to "cheap" gin because it has the perfect amount of sweetness for a gin. Plymouth is similar and technically better in my opinion, but not $10 better. If you want something to make classic gin cocktails that aren't too dry or citrus-y, then you really don't need to look any further.19.99 USD per Bottle -
The nose is a little difficult to pick out, and tricks you into thinking it will be more savory than it is. I get peppermint, cola, star anise, and cinnamon bark. Palate: Cola syrup hits you instantly, followed by licorice and fennel, manifested by a similarly prominent note that is equal parts sweet and herbal. This melds with cinnamon candy in the finish that functions like an avatar for spice, neatly hiding the alcohol heat that shows up at the end. I tried a 50mL of this, liked it, bought a bottle (still like it), but probably won't do it again. There are too many other liqueurs out there that scratch exactly the same itch, but aren't associated with frat parties. Update: I DID buy it again (and mix it with Disaronno), because it's good and IDGAF.25.99 USD per Bottle
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I was thrilled when Distiller introduced liqueurs, mainly because I could finally review my beloved Disaronno! The nose is almost one note: sweet-ass maraschino cherry. This is as close to nosing distilled cherry vanilla ice cream as you're probably ever going to get. Thick and syrupy-sweet on the palate, almond marzipan joins the cherry, with the accompanying alcohol reminding you of some sort of decadent flambée dessert. This is a simple but extremely delicious drink, the perfect dessert over ice, and overthinking it would be a disservice.29.99 USD per Bottle
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So far, I've tasted the "big four" Cognacs from Houses Hennessy, Remy, Courvoisier and Martell. Hine seemed like a logical next step. This one has a bright and fruity nose, grape and raspberry jam, cherry cobbler, and other sweet red fruit desserts. A slight dusty lime. The taste falls flat though; watery and flavorless on the entry, it then turns starkly saline. Tart brambleberry. There is no spice here at all, just a young-tasting (for a VSOP), light, fresh, and fruity Cognac with limited complexity. The last few drops in the glass tasted exactly like unsweetened raspberry tea. A bit one-dimensional, but it really heralds Spring.32.99 USD per Bottle
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I don't normally care for lowland tequilas, but I got a 200mL bottle of this just to compare with the reposado I opened last year which was decent. The nose is hot, sharp, and salty, with pink grapefruit but also an underlying sweet putty. The palate has a similar dynamic, about 1/3 sweet (agave and stone fruit) and 2/3 salt and pepper. The finish is mineral and dry. Good for margaritas.23.99 USD per Bottle
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Tasting this was exclusively the result of my mom asking for a "good scotch" for Christmas, which my brain automatically translated as "the cheapest single malt I can get my Scroogie little hands on". At $20 a bottle (which I patiently waited to go on sale to $18), this was easily the one. I didn't really know what to expect going into this, but little did I know just how unusual it was going to be. The nose can be summarized like this: honey and...agave somehow. This feels like nosing a tequila, and I can't even begin to explain why. The bottle notes mention green apple and lemon, so maybe I'm misinterpreting that. Who knows? In any case, its youth makes itself known right away, with a bit of heat shoving its way through the initial flavors. Among these are the same honey-agave but with a slight herbal character, black tea with lemon, and unburnt tobacco. Medium-length finish, but heat is left on the tongue for quite some time, despite its low ABV. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that there are probably better blends out there at this price. Other than some honey and weird-ass fruit, this is not a very good representation of a highland malt, or even a whisky for that matter. However, as the recipient proudly stated that she could indeed distinguish the taste of this from a bourbon, the guilt of not spending an extra $10 on the age statement seemed to just melt away. Maybe next time...or maybe Monkey Shoulder instead.21.99 USD per Bottle
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Four Roses Yellow Label Bourbon
Bourbon — Kentucky, USA
Reviewed May 9, 2019 (edited August 24, 2019)Buttery caramel corn and brown sugar on the nose. Very thin-bodied and mellow. Any type of drinker could drink this. Citrus and nutmeg up front, with more classic vanilla notes hanging around in the back. It finishes bitter with a little more honey citrus dotted in, and the dryness holding off until the last of the flavor subsides. I would call this a little better than Jim Beam or Maker's Mark but in the same lane, which is squarely in the middle of the road.21.99 USD per Bottle -
This strangely smells like an herbal liqueur, and the nose is by far the most interesting part: licorice, cola, and hints of black pepper. The palate is a letdown though, as nothing but blank astringency hits you first, and then the muted flavors unbuckle themselves and slowly saunter to the front: "prickly" vanilla (think the cheapest of white rums), followed by a blast of heat and cheap bourbon flavors so subtle that you'll wonder if your taste buds are working. The ending contains a disappointing *poof* of char that just tastes like a tiny bitter ash floating up from the ethanol, along with a minuscule amount of sweetness and accompanied by a sad trombone. If this was supposed to be the "black" part, then it is akin to a single dead dove being shot out of a wedding cake; the presence of it is entirely expected based on the labeling, but the delivery is so anticlimactic (and in such shockingly poor taste) that you feel like it somehow warrants an apology.32.99 USD per Bottle
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