Ardbeg Wee Beastie

Neck pour. Interesting. Far different from the rest of the Ardbeg I tried this evening.

May not be quite as peaty as the other Ardbegs but it’s a very tasty dram.

a drink almost entirely inspired by smoked pork and the art of cooking stewed meat in general, my shameful pleasure

By Wee Beastie, they're implying, of course, a "little beast," but with a 5 year old scotch, I'm thinking, "Weeeeeeeeee, Beastie!" Because that's the true sound of a 5 year old. Going down the slide, being tossed about in a tilt-a-whirl. But I'm also thinking, we BEASTIE! As in, this is the beast in Ardbeg's core lineup. As in the untamed, the unhinged. As in the slightly sharper, less refined, gruffer version of its older siblings. An apt comparison here, if you're familiar, would be the Highland Park Magnus to the Highland Park 12. Magnus sounds like Beastie, and true to Beastie form, it's got more edge as well. Don't get me wrong, if refinement is what you're looking for, the Park 12 and Ardbeg 10 are better whiskies. But sometimes, don't you want a little stank, a little sweet and lowdown, a little nitty in your gritty? I do. Not always, but enough that I appreciate the option being available. If Ardbeg 10 is the country club, this is the bluegrass hoedown. If Ardbeg 10 is the Foxtrot to Sinatra, this is getting freaky in the club to whoever people get freaky in the club to these days (I'm 8 times as old as the whisky I'm reviewing here, so I don't know). I love the boldness of putting a 5 year age statement on it. It's like putting rims on 1984 Ford Escort. Young whisky risks too much grain, but that's not the case here. There are plenty of people who love this, don't get me wrong. And those who love it can contextualize it the way I'm doing now. But I've see others who hate it, and while I'd like to say that's okay, when I look at the haters, what I see are that stodgy guy in the back of his Royce rolling down the window asking for Grey Poupon when this is Gulden's Spicy Brown and trying to judge it as though it should be something more is...well, go ahead. I'm just not sure I see the point. It's Ardbeg, so the brass tacks here are peat smoke, sea salt, iodine. But where this differs from the 10 (and I've tasted them together) is that you get a strong butterscotch flavor with the youth of the Beastie. But what we're working with when I say butterscotch is really like a Werther's Original. And true to the stank theme here, it's like a Werther's Original that's mellowed in your grandpa's pocket on a hot summer day, and he's bequeathed it to you, and while you might like ice cream better (read: Ardbeg 10), grandpa is on a pension now, and this was the best he could do on his budget. And so, you get the Beastie. Now if only what they meant by Beastie could have included an advertising campaign with MCA (r.i.p.), Ad-Rock and Mic D. Maybe some archival footage from those first three records to really get at the nature of the Beast. A shame that no one thought of it really, but even without the ad campaign, I picked up 4 bottles on sale for $36.99/bottle. List price here is 43.99, so really, what are we complaining about? Party with the beast while you can.