Basil Hayden Toast
Bourbon — USATasted May 30, 2022Beam Suntory as a brand is as frustrating and polarising as the lame hyphenated company name it currently holds. So many products makes it lack any identity. Coupled with the various departments of Beam distilled offerings , the inconsistent values and the sometimes insulting marketing gimmicks makes it hard to pin down. The Basil Hayden line therefore, is the quintessential Beam Suntory product. It doesn’t look flashy but carries itself as if it did. It’s not that great but it thinks it is. Toast is a continuation of that mindset. Priced too high. Generic bottle with a flashy faux-brass belt buckle to hide the fact. And the name…Toast…is somehow not in reference to anything charred or barrel-related but instead to the substitution of brown rice instead of rye? Baffling. The juice is solid. The rice for rye swap is surprisingly very pleasant. This goes down easy but not memorable. So why isn’t it priced accordingly? This doesn’t make consumers warm towards you, rather it makes them wary and suspicious of anything you release. So Beam. Suntory. Whoever you are now. STOP. Just make decent bourbon at decent prices with no gimmicks. Is it that difficult? I wish this wasn’t watered down to 80 proof and I wish it were $20 cheaper. Then this would be very good. Instead, it’s kind of annoying. Glad I tried it but I’ll never buy another bottle.
Maker's Mark Cask Strength Batch 21-03 (109.4 Proof)
Bourbon — Kentucky , USATasted March 30, 2022With the bumbling criminals that run our country at the helm, the supply chains are broken to the point that the once ubiquitous Makers Mark is now unavailable. This has forced me to dive into my coffers of cask strength and served to remind me how great these are, what value they provide, and how sad it is that many may never know the silky touch of its velvet hand. This is strong, smooth, rich and manly. Its a shame for you, dear reader of this worthless review, that you arent here sharing it with me. But youre not. And now its gone. Just like the mind of Our Dear Leader.
Bacardí Superior White Rum
Silver Rum — Puerto RicoTasted February 19, 2022Its diffficult after all this time to retrtace ones steps to visit a mega brand like this and give it a fair shake. Its also fair to assume that a product this ubiquitous and global is a far cry from where it began. I assume at one point Bacardi was a respected name in rum. Not just a mass produced mainstay, I mean RESPECTED. At one point this brand had to have had either great value, quality, marketing, or all three. This is probably the first silver rum most Americans are introduced to, most likely procured from a dusty patch-covered Jansport in a high school restroom and served in an opaque plastic cup filled with ice and some cola. Most likely its the first rum most americans overindulge on and repel into the gaping maw of the porcelain throne. Its become a staple of nearly every bar in the country simply because people ask for it, maybe out of loyalty to an amazing brand, but most likely because they dont have a list of availabke spirits and thus they take a shot in the dark, and call out a name that will most likely land them with a drink vs the "we dont carry that" alternative response. At this point I will not deep dive into when and where and how this product achieved such prominence to the point tht they can now remove any and all redeeming qualitites from the rum it once must have been and it still wouldnt touch their bottom line. Yet at some point this must have occurred. This is barely a rum. In fact if it werent for the flash of sugar that appears befre dissolving into the vapid neutral papery world normally occupied by vodka and nail polish remover, I would guess this is generic plastic bottle vodka. Its been distilled to the point all character is obliterated. This is rum for people who dont like rum. Rum for people who only drink "vodka crans". Rum for the guy who drinks rum once a year at his work christmas party. But this isnt rum for anyone who has any interest in rum. This isnt rum for anyone who has any interest in anything outside of getting the fastest possible ticket to drunk town at whatever cost necessary. So congrats on your success in the world of "product", Bacardi, but you must harbor the knowledge somewhere deep inside though you may never admit it. You must know it all centers around one word. Trash. That word not only descibes this product, it also serves as the name of the verb describing what action youve taken in relation to this brand... and its also the word which describes the state the unwashed masses who imbibe this find themselves in and its also the name for the medium in which which every bottle of this should be lying in were this a just world. Trash. Own it, for it is your legacy. Good day, sirs.
Cutwater Three Sheets Barrel Aged Rum
Aged Rum — California, USATasted February 10, 2022Cutwater three sheets white rum Aged 2 years in bourbon barrels. Oaky front end, bitter wood tannins. Nice dark color but in the rum world that could mean anything. This is solid and kudos for making this so affordable despite the obvious aging process length. I need to taste the base rum to be able to really tell but there is something missing in this. Not that its bad. Its not. I like it. Its just not as memorable as I wanted it to be.
Basil Hayden Dark Rye
Other Whiskey — Multiple CountriesTasted February 7, 2022I understand aging whiskey in port barrels. I don’t understand simply mixing whiskey with port as it looks and tastes like it was done here. What a weird approach. i disapprove. To name this dark rye is the same misleading gimmicky Jim Beam nonsense as they often pull. Why would you waste basil haydens mixing it with port. Not that BH is that great but you wouldnt, and they didnt. Too much wine for it to be whiskey and too much suck for it to be a success.
George Dickel No. 12
Tennessee — Tennessee, USATasted February 7, 2022With Joe Biden, the most popular president to ever exist, in the fairest election ever held in the history of time, we as Americans, all decided that, yes, we want things to suck more than before. So now we got what we all wanted and we are so happy. The bourbon world feels like its all adequately priced, now that our amazing politicians have put us all trillions more into debt so they can be more wealthy for our best interests. This means, happily, that prices on everything have gone up up up up and scarcity is widespread and yeah you gotta hand it to bourbon for being so ahead of its time. There are however a few pesky relics of the past still standing their ground and being fair and reasonable and just and keeping the value high and the cost low. The chief amongst these stalwart threats to our democracy is George Dickel. No doubt leading the charge on this radical viewpoint, it stubbornly remains the very best value in the bourbon world, especially with this offering. Its damn good too. So until we stamp out these last few terrorists you should get it while you can. Because America is building back better baby. Not better for us, just for the few at the top. And we are all apparently on board with that. Brandon For Life.
Auchentoshan American Oak
Single Malt — Lowlands, ScotlandTasted February 5, 2022I had to work real hard to find something interesting here. I found it to be thin and floral and too much of a p*ssy to even stand up to water. Water obliterated this. It’s probably the fluoride. It was From the hose after all. Not my hose. My neighbors. I’ve got hose in all area codes. Not a lot of water, mind you, Just a few drops I shook from the end of it. It’s a trick I learned from having to urinate daily all these years with the machinery I was born with. But anyway yeah this was destroyed by a few drops of water and I was bummed.
Colonel E.H. Taylor, Jr. Single Barrel Bourbon
Bourbon — Kentucky, USATasted February 5, 2022I regularly buy this for around $40. Why is this considered rare and why is the secondary markup so high? In any case I stashed a few and I’ve drank a few. This is much much better than Small Batch which always seems a bit off to me. This has a lingering finish, punched you in the mouth immediately exactly how you want to be punched. When compared to the small batch side by side I found this is hotter with more leather. Like the fantasy biker babe I’ve always been too scared to develop a fantasy for, I guess. Well to hell with that fantasia, I’ve got THIS which is apparently rare and coveted. Somewhere. I am aware single barrel offerings can give unique experiences so I’m going to use that to say if You disagree with my review it’s not that I’m wrong or You’re right, it’s that we have different biker batches and different bourbon batches too and variety is to be expected. Then we can all be winners!
St. Elder Natural Elderflower Liqueur
Floral Liqueurs — USATasted February 4, 2022Almost nothing on the bottle except that is handcrafted in small batches which means nothing as those terms are undefined. It also says the recommended use is to be topped off by Prosecco, which screams “Man” louder than anything else I can think of. Not meant to be taken neat though I did. It’s sweet. Tastes and smells like perfume. It’s kind of nice. Taken as recommended it does harmonize well with Prosecco. The floral quality does t overpower in various cocktails I’ve tried and works well as a mixer. Only maniacs would drink this neat more than once.
The Irishman Founder's Reserve
Blended — IrelandTasted February 3, 2022This offering puzzled me. I didn’t know what to think a few months ago when I first broke the seal. I didn’t know what to think as I ponderously made my way through it. And having finished it I still know not what to think. But Its gone now and I have to write something. I like this distiller/brand. They usually. put out great product. This is not great product. It’s kind of boring. It never changes after being allowed to breathe. It stays boring. Too young maybe, too malty maybe. I don’t know. I don’t know what to think. But I’m kind of glad the bottle is empty so I don’t have to anymore