Tastes
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Elenita Pineapple Jalapeño
Ready to Drink — Oaxaca, Mexico
Reviewed April 28, 2021 (edited April 30, 2021)One of the best, most refreshing RTD's on the market, Elenita Pineapple Jalapeño functions as a cross between a mixed drink and hard seltzer. It's flavors are light, natural, and play in the background of the carbonation giving this the feel of a hard seltzer but the presence of Mezcal makes it almost feel like a fruit juice mixer. It's a refreshing, welcome balance that never veers into artificial flavoring or unnecessary sugar. At 7% ABV it also provides a pleasant buzz without being too boozy or light. The carbonation is on point as well, never becoming overpowering or feeling flat. Poured in a glass it smells of fragrant pineapple with a prominent smoky kick from the mezcal. There's also a lingering spicy kick in the back end but you can't smell it from the can. The taste is sublime. You're greeted by a very pleasant mix of pineapple, cooked agave and good carbonation playing off each other at just the right amounts. The mid palate has the smokiness of the Mezcal introducing itself without overpowering the flavors and towards the back mid palate the faint taste of jalapeño is noticeable, though it's very subtle. Blink and you miss it but it rounds out the experience quite nicely if you look for it. The finish has a light spicy kick from the jalapeño complementing the carbonation and fading away into a fresh pineapple juice finish. This is one of the best RTDs on the market showcasing a rare balance and favoring natural tasting ingredients. It also feels true to the experience of drinking a Mezcal mixed drink. I just wish the jalapeño was a bit more prominent but that's nitpicking a great experience. Be sure to get this for your summer adventures! -
Sauza Tequila Blanco
Tequila Mixto — Tequila Valley, Jalisco, Mexico
Reviewed April 27, 2021 (edited April 30, 2021)It's amazing to return to this product with some age. Sauza was my go to Tequila in my early college days as it was affordable, tasted like agave and didn't immediately make me want to puke like Cuervo. But alas my fond memories of this product aren't to last now that I have a more sophisticated palate. Let's begin with the aroma. For a mixto, it's honestly not bad. There is a pungent smell of alcohol interwoven with agave but it doesn't overpower the other notes. There's hints of green apple, a vegetal muskiness and an undefined floral characteristic. I'm floored that the official tasting notes are pretty accurate though calling the floral smell Jasmine feels a bit fanciful from Sauza's part. Faintly in the background there is a white pepper note doing it's best to hide itself away. The taste itself is also surprisingly palatable--don't get me wrong here, I don't mean it's *good* but it isn't undrinkable. Agave with a strong ethanol presence dominates the palate. It feels extremely disjointed & unrefined but honestly it doesn't burn the tongue. The mid palate is of artificial green apple and there's a weird, almost tea like note in the back. It's completely undefined but not unpleasant. Almost as if you brewed a third cup of the same tea only to find out most of the flavor is gone. It's also a surprisingly salty, borderline briny Tequila. It isn't immediately apparent. Rather as you drink it and reflect on it you realize there's a weird saltiness in your tongue and it's hard to ignore when you notice it. But it's also not super prominent. Hard to describe. It's basically annoying enough to make itself known but not enough to "ruin" the experience, not that tasting this is super pleasant to begin with. But where the Tequila really falls apart is the finish. It doesn't burn you the way Jose Cuervo Especial does. It is, however, fairly bitter. Pretty akin to eating the pith of a lime with some weird citrusy undernotes. This lasts for about 20 seconds before giving way to both a white pepper finish and an absolutely terrible swill of processed chemicals. The pepper does a good job in masking the chemical process but sadly it lingers in the back of your throat for way longer than it should. I wouldn't really recommend this Tequila for sipping or drinking by itself. It isn't half bad for making a giant, cheap margarita mix for a large gathering though. But it has few uses as a serious mixer. I recommend the Zapopan if you want a cheap mixer. -
Mezcal El Silencio Espadín
Mezcal Joven — Oaxaca, Mexico
Reviewed April 27, 2021 (edited May 2, 2022)El Silencio is part of the Mezcal brands trying to bridge the gap between making an accessible, gentler Mezcal that will be palatable to Tequila drinkers without compromising too much on traditional Mezcal methods. This is not a wholly industrialized product but it doesn't aim for the traditional Mezcal flavors. As such, this should be viewed as an introductory Mezcal and not one for seasoned veterans. The marketing itself makes it explicit that this is also meant more for mixing than neat sipping & the pricing makes it clear this isn't an artisanal, high level product. I don't have a problem with what El Silencio sets out to do & the glowing online reviews by Mezcal newbies showcase they are doing something right. As far as Mezcals go this is indeed very accessible and smooth. The smokiness is present throughout the experience without feeling overbearing or covering the other flavors. In fact, I initially bought the mini because a recipe called for a splash of Mezcal & it exceeded my expectations, making it's presence known without overpowering any other ingredients. But enough background information, let's get on to the actual tasting. The nose is nothing exceptional. It's actually quite muted all things considered. I could pick out a buttery, almost cream cheese like smell along with a musty, earthy aroma. There's also light, subtle fruity hints but they're ephemeral and hard to pin down. My best guess would be green apple or a tart pear. Bit of a mineral smell too. The most obvious smells are of roasted agave and (by Mezcal standards) light smoke, but these are to be expected. The taste is surprisingly watery and honestly fairly bland. There isn't a lot going on here. The sweet agave is prominent and counter-balanced by the light smokiness. There's a leathery taste to it and a mineral like quality to the finish. I don't have much at all to say about the finish. It's just the smokiness tapering off. This is the closest I've had a Mezcal come to tasting like a Tequila without it feeling like it compromises it's roots. So by all accounts, mission accomplished. I'll finish by stating that this is actually quite a decent mixer. The earthyness, manageable smokiness, sweet agave and faint fruity notes all allow this to be a versatile, cheap mixer. It won't overpower the cocktail but it won't fade into the background either. It's at a good balance. While it's too bland for any Mezcal fan to sip on, it's not bad to keep on hand to introduce someone into the world of Mezcal with a few cocktails and some tastes. -
Rating liqueurs can be tricky business. Am I just rating how it tastes neat or how well it works in different cocktails? It's never an easy call. Certainly Kahlua plays an important role as a major ingredient in classic White and Black Russians. It's ubiquitous nature also makes it an immediate stand in for any recipe calling for coffee liqueur. It's easy to see why it's so popular as well. The nose is enticingly sweet without sacrificing a real roasted coffee flavor. It even has a bit of lingering spices, cinnamon being the most prominent with hints of caramel & vanilla. It's not a deep aroma but it doesn't have to be when it's so pleasant. Taste wise it begins almost like chocolate milk before the Arabica coffee hits your palate mingling with this nice toffee taste. The coffee is, not unsurprisingly, the main show runner and as the mid palate develops you get a flurry of brief, sweet tastes. Toffee, sugary vanilla, caramel syrup. It brings to mind the sensation of drinking melted coffee & vanilla ice cream that had been topped with milk chocolate syrup. Towards the back of the mid palate out to the finish you get a nice rum sensation providing some needed robustness to the experience. Not much to the finish either. It's rum, coffee bitterness, and overpowering caramel and vanilla sweetness from the additives. My main gripe with Kahlua is actually how unnecessarily sweet it feels. They can cut down on the sugar & additives and still have a great, versatile product. It's not impossible to drink on its own but aside from a sugar rush and some pleasant coffee notes, it just doesn't have much to offer. Do you really want to drink coffee syrup by itself? It's not so bad if you dilute it with some ice and when mixing I suggest you start off light lest the brazen sugar overtake the other ingredients. Its not a bad product, but one which could use some refinement.
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I'm on the fence about this one but gravitating towards actually deeply enjoying it. Mainly, I can't decipher whether I like it's approach to be both sweet & bitter without any tartness and my brain cannot decide if it tastes somewhat artificial or it's just the smell that seems fake. Certainly the aroma would lead you to believe this is flavored nonsense. You get clear lemon zest, limeade, and it brings back memories of the smell of powdered limeade premixes my family would buy when we couldn't afford real, fresh squeezed limeade. I would even go so far as to say it smells like the Minute Maid Lime sorbet. Taste wise it strikes an interesting balance between sweetness and bitterness. When sweet it reminds me of a key lemon pie and careless afternoons with citrusy sorbets. The bitterness is close to what I would expect an extract from lime & lemon peels to taste like. It's the kind of bitterness you seek in a Vodka Tonic imbued with a bit of lime juice & zest. Towards the mid palate there is a taste almost reminiscent of a tart granny apple and the finish does include bitterness of the ethanol kind. Still, this is quite a refreshing vodka just begging to be mixed in a tonic or actual citrusy summer drink. This would go over well at a summer party being a versatile drink that can sub in a variety of cocktails while still providing a fun citrusy twist. Not bad!
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Luminar Mezcal Reposado
Mezcal Reposado — Zacatecas, Mexico
Reviewed April 24, 2021 (edited April 26, 2021)Luminar gets a lot of hate from Mezcal aficionados online but is it warranted? I wanted to take an objective, undogmatic approach to this controversial brand. Right from the get-go it became apparent where the controversy lies. This doesn't smell like a traditional Mezcal. Matter of fact it smells almost exactly like a traditional, borderline generic Tequila! This makes sense of course. It's made from the same agave tequila is made from and truth be told the brand doesn't follow Mezcal tradition. It's close ties with Kimo Sabe, a Mezcal brand known for trying to smooth over Mezcal's smoky edges for a more accessible experience, so it's no surprise it's sister brand takes a similar philosophy to production. So here is what the actual experience is like, considerations of artisan tradition aside. The nose is very approachable with pineapple, vanilla, and oak immediately apparent. There's also a pleasant earthiness to the smell. Even a bit of grassiness to the smell. Pretty standard stuff but there is a distinct if subtle smell of smokiness. On the palate the agave is surprisingly front and center, dancing unrestrained on the tongue for most of the front and mid palate before the pineapple and subtle smokiness take over. The finish is pleasantly of vanilla and oak though they last only for ten seconds before giving way to pineapple and a bitter taste of alcohol. Overall it tastes like a $25 bottle of reposado Tequila would with the added caveat of an underlying smokiness underpinning the entire experience. Personally I don't hate it though I wouldn't buy this bottle if I wanted a Mezcal. It's more what I would get to help a friend transition into Mezcal from Tequila and help them get acclimated to the world of Mezcal. It's up to you whether this training wheel Mezcal is worth getting. -
Cutwater White Russian
Ready to Drink — California, USA
Reviewed April 23, 2021 (edited April 26, 2021)I am thoroughly impressed with this effort. The vodka and coffee cream liqueurs are in perfect balance which is all the more stunning when you factor in that this has two shots of vodka in it with the beverage clocking in at a boozy 14%. The coffee, chocolate and vanilla flavors are all noticeable on the palate without being remotely cloying. It has the perfect amount of sweetness and none of the burn that would come were this made with a cheap vodka. Without a doubt Fugu Vodka is Cutwater's strongest hard spirit and it's put to exceptional use here. This is an above average White Russian at a great price point and good convenience. Be sure to check it out! -
Veil Vodka has...shall we say a questionable reputation of making flavored nonsense. Which is why I chose this flavor. Surely you can't go wrong with such a simple concept for a flavor. But alas, here we are. The smell alone is pretty preposterous. It reminds me of those odd mixed drinks Denny's used to serve under names like Pacific Chiller. I hadn't thought of that smell in ages and never dreamed I would chance upon it when reviewing a flavored vodka. To it's credit you can smell the cranberry and lime. But they don't smell natural. Or artificial. They just smell bizarre. Almost fizzly or bubbly. Not sure how they pulled that off. And somehow the rest of the aromas are of dusty vodka. Sweet dust reminiscent of a Denny's carbonated beverage is a wild tasting note. It also tastes like the Denny's drinks! But if you've never had them that isn't a particularly useful frame of reference. So it tastes like concentrated corn syrup that came from a Sprite doused with Rose's grenadine. The vodka is just barely discernible at the finish. But really it's a syrup bomb baby. I'm honestly surprised this isn't carbonated either because it packs this weird kick that's reminiscent of sodas. My best guess is some acerbic acid added in to pretend there's actual lime in this product? Yeah the taste isn't great. It's overly sweet nature makes it supremely cloying and undrinkable by itself. Looking up reviews online and people seem to love it on ice or with ginger beer. I guess that could work but why not add real cranberry juice with vodka to your ginger beer? Or just syrups because that's what this is: glorified, vodka infused cheap syrups.
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Bear Valley Brandy
American Brandy — California, USA
Reviewed April 23, 2021 (edited December 31, 2022)What an absolutely disgusting product. The nose is faintly of lightly putrid grapes, a spicy oak (it's supposed to be aged in fired oak) that's very off from what it's supposed to smell like and paint thinner with medicinal notes. Even the two smells that should be there, grapes and oak, don't come together in unison and instead seem to act in direct opposition to each other. But it doesn't really matter since the prevailing smell is of paint thinner and nail polish. There's also a disgusting "wet sock" aroma that is just as foul as it sounds. I'm sorry I don't have a better descriptor for the smell. Just the foul odor wine left opened on a hot day in a small space produces. Horrid. Things go downhill once you put this in your mouth. It genuinely tastes unfinished. Like someone decided they wanted to make a very bitter liqueur with brandy as its base and after adding one or two random ingredients forgot about it, chucked it into some random barrels for a month or two then called it a day. This straight up doesn't taste like brandy. You have to fight against all the unpleasant flavors threatening to make you spit it out to find even any note of grape and oak barrel. They mostly come at the finish but are so fleeting they may as well be irrelevant. So what tastes do you actually get? Well, it's hard to describe because the English language isn't really well suited to describe highly distinct but unpleasant tastes. They're superbly bitter, spicy, potent and pervasive. Take your pick between putrid oak, tingly rot, lab grade ethanol and pungent astringency Worst of all they're all disentangled. There's no flow or cohesion here. It's just random bursts of unpleasantness with some grape and oak now and then. Occasionally medicinal notes pop up before giving way to more astringency and bitterness. The product legitimately feels unfinished and as if it was made from the grapes about to go rotten and casks all other distillers and people who care about quality control rejected. The finish is the absolute worst though as all of the bitterness and off-notes come to roost in one final assault. If the rest of the experience lacked unity, the finish is the exact opposite. It's a concerted assault on the senses that just beats you down with overt medicinal notes rounding out the climaxing bitterness of the front and mid palate. I'm impressed that this got progressively worse. Were they intentionally trying to make the worst tasting "brandy" possible? The only reason this is getting .25 stars from me and not a flat out 0 is because the bottle and label actually look cool. I'd buy an empty bottle and fill it with E&J Brandy or Christian Brothers. Sure, those aren't exactly great brandies either but at least they are drinkable but come in horridly boring bottles. But aside from this niche use this is something to be avoided at all costs. Incidentally, there's no digital trail for this product. It's a BevMo! Exclusive but I couldn't find who the criminal responsible for this is. BevMo! and other major retailers love to pump out ghost brands sourced from major producers and market them under a random name, usually overpriced. Occasionally they'll come out with something reasonable and affordable like BevMo!'s Kisoyama Yuhi, a "Japanese" Whiskey that really comes from Europe but is bottled in Japan. But at $24 it's actually not bad albeit highly deceptive. Bear Valley is another such deceptive brand built solely to move more product with no regard to much else. But still, I've never had anything this despicable and unconscionable. -
I was fully expecting to loathe this gin. Back in my college days I viewed it with utter contempt as a harsh vodka with next to no gin characteristics. But I'll readily admit that initial assessment was incorrect though I can understand why I felt that way. See, Seagram's biggest flaw is how watery and light on the tongue it is. It doesn't have any particularly robust flavors so the juniper and alcohol burn stand out. Add in someone inexperienced with gins and drinking from a red solo cup and this would indeed taste as a harsh vodka. But as one grows they become more discerning. Seagram's doesn't have a lot to offer but by the same token, for it's price it's actually a worthy budget gin. The smell is primarily of orange peel followed by a light, tame juniper. Further in the background is coriander and root spices are just barely perceptible if you know where to look. On the tongue this almost reminds me of an orange peel jelly treat. It's surprisingly sweet in it's citrusy bitterness and the juniper is present enough to make this feel like a proper gin. The finish is spicy and heat forward giving it a nice burn to finish with. For a gin it's nothing harsh--if anything it may be more on the forgiving side. The watery nature of the gin also almost makes it feel like drinking a spice laden orange tea. While I wouldn't mind drinking Seagram's by itself the sweetness and citrus dominated palate are just begging for this to be mixed with any and all juices. Snoop Dogg was into something with his love of Seagram's. I gave it an extra half a star because for the price point this is quite tasty.
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