Tastes

A birthday indulgence tonight, and oh what a pleasure! The nose is like an elaborate, motor-powered model of the solar system: some scents whizzing to the front before dissipating just as swiftly; some drifting slowly closer; all intricately weaving, waxing and waning, intertwining, and overlapping. Stellar! No alcohol burn on the nose which is surprising for the ABV; light rubber; clove, but with a sweetness like a clove drop; faint creosote I think; something fruity but I can’t tell what; briny, ashtray notes like burnt seaweed; car ferry deck; light peat but it was not the first thing that struck me; pipe smoke – it, combined with the brine and the peat, conjures childhood memories of my great grandfather’s cottage on Achill island; a trace of a woody smell after a few sips. Overall it is complex and truly enchanting. Nothing too prominent or overpowering. Supremely balanced. There is heat upfront on the palate – I can feel the ABV now. Pepper spice arrival that is also slightly bitter; peat smoke upfront too; earthy, vegetal development; maybe a bit of clove spice too; charred meat; sea salt in the middle and finish; dipping to the lips gives a sweeter profile – brown sugar and licorice; lovely, long, sweet, salty, smoky ash finish – campfire or turf fire ash. Yes, this is a muddled ramble; an outpouring of jumbled thoughts - but that’s what this dram can do to you!

Lately I've been assembling a catalogue of things that I've called ‘Stuff Only a B*****d Would Dislike'. So far the list includes: 1) Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da by The Beatles 2) The Siberian Flying Squirrel 3) Groundhog Day Slights and slurs are far too commonplace in this age of trolls, and insults are flung like confetti without real meaning and purpose. The aim of this list is a bit like the Voight-Kampff test that Deckard uses. It would help to conclusively identify the really bad eggs of humanity with a collection of items that are well-nigh impossible to dislike. Unless you're a stone cold b*****d. This is the simple, scientific means to call them out and apply a derogatory label in an irrefutable and meaningful way. Enter #4 onto this list Glenmorangie Original 10 Year Old. It has a gentle, fruity perfume of orange, honey and a touch of mint. It carries a sweet taste of citrus, vanilla cream, light oak and ginger. I’m not saying it’s the greatest, no, no. But it’s a perfect scotch to while away a pleasant evening chatting or playing cards. Not offensive. Not brash. Hell, it’s just well-nigh impossible to dislike. Now if you already use this site or app and are part of its community you must be good people. And of course I’m too polite to call anyone here offensive names. But take a look at the list. The list doesn’t lie…

The Irishman Founder’s Reserve is a NAS blend of Single Malt (70%) and Pot Still (30%) whiskeys from Walsh Whiskey that is triple distilled and matured in Bourbon casks. Their Royal Oak distillery in County Carlow opened in 2016 and produces The Writers’ Tears range also. I took an interesting tour of the distillery last year - I was in a tour group of one, so I got some undivided attention from the knowledgeable guide. With their own means of production they plan to extend their range under both brands, and they hope to soon release the first whiskey distilled at their new facility. In the meantime this is produced to Walsh's recipe by Midleton distillery. This smells better than it tastes. The nose is light and fruity, with cereal and vanilla but a tad too much ethanol. The palate is lightly sweet, malt and honey - pleasant but far from remarkable. A few drops of water mutes the ethanol but I found that it is easily drowned. Calibrate carefully! In my opinion, it’s not as good as The Irishman 12 Year Single Malt, which is also aged in ex-bourbon casks, but better than the The Irishman Single Malt NAS that is aged in a mixture of ex-bourbon and ex-Oloroso sherry casks. But hey, my personal preferences tend to slightly lean away from the sweeter “winey’ finishes

Simple, straight-forward, pleasant and light. Grassy nose and the taste is dry, soft and uncomplicated. Burn free and short finish.

Arctic Monkeys. The Infinite Monkey Cage. Twelve Monkeys. Good things can come with simian-themed titles. So, what about this whisky? Monkey Shoulder is a blend from William Grants of different Speyside single malts that is very available and inexpensive to pick up. More recently they have been more guarded about the constituent malts, but it was previously known to be a blend of Balvenie, Glenfiddich and Kininvie. Despite the fact this is a blended malt, the initial nose is akin to that of a grain blend with an alcohol whiff and notes reminiscent of toasted bread by a swimming pool. Left for a while to open I can detect honey, orange, pear brandy, toffee, light wood and some floral hints. All very quiet: nothing complex but nevertheless attractive in its simplicity. There is a pleasant warmth on the palate with orange, grapefruit and grain alcohol. On some sips this youthful “grainy” trait appears as a slightly intrusive soapy savour and a back-throat burn, remedied by a few drops of water. The finish is short and lightly sweet. All in all, Monkey Shoulder is a decent dram but not one I’d go back to. Apparently, it was created to try and tempt bourbon drinkers into Scotch and their website additionally states that it is a premium blended malt made for mixing. I like it well enough - I do like it - and I ought not be too hard on it, but this is to "premium" blended malts as The Monkees are to The Beatles.

What is the greatest Scotch? My pick is still Lagavulin 16 Year Old (though my personal affection for Poit Dhubh 21 Year Old has swelled substantially after recent tastes). And even if there are quite a few other Scotches I’d think of first if ever the question was posed – and I’m passably informed of the typical top tier – Highland Park 12 is the one I’ll often offer to someone asking for a recommendation. An air of wispy smoke, toffee, honey, cranberry and a mountain potpourri of sprightly heather, bracken and flowers. A tinge of paint initially, so I would advise allowing this to breathe for a short while. A sweet, honey taste with some oak and maritime notes. A light, pleasant sweet and smoky finish that tails off with a Ceylon tea that adds a dainty, dry briskness. In fact, this is the whisky for people who say: I don’t like smoky whiskies. This is the text for the teacher; the manuscript for the missionary. The vital tool one requires to convert those horrible heathens. Haven’t had it yet? Quick, save yourself, before it’s too late.

1901 - Hey, sorry to interrupt. You smell nice. Yellow Spot - Eh, thanks [laughs nervously] 1901 - Yeah, very fragrant. I just know you are my type: sweet and rich. Yellow Spot - Uh-huh, riiiight [eyes dart left and right] 1901 - [licks lips slowly] Yellow Spot - O-kaaay, riiiight. Oh my God, I uhm totally forgot to ehm, I just gotta go over...[backs away] 1901 - Hey? [louder] HEY? Your younger sister. Is she around?

For some time now, I've belonged to a clandestine clique of whiskey drinkers who don’t really appreciate Johnnie Walker Black. We use shadowy hand signals and asinine passphrases because we cannot express our views in public without risking our whiskey credibility. In a dank and dusty den, we meet on a bi-monthly basis and drink unchallenging masterworks like Green Spot and The Balvenie Doublewood. It’s a heavy burden and we suffer in silence, but we welcome new members if you can uncover our hideaway hangout. On the other hand, if you want to cast your lot with an opposing faction that includes Robert Mugabe and Colonel Gaddafi that’s your call.

Torfa is apparently the Old Norse for turf. Bit of hard work there for the etymologists. This is Glenglassaugh's first foray (since its reopening I guess) into a peated malt and at 20ppm it is on the lighter end of the bog band. That might give the impression that it is a little restrained or muted. Not so. It is a sprightly young NAS, matured solely in ex-bourbon barrels and, with 50% abv, it delivers a nice kick. The nose is of light, sweet peat smoke mingled with citrus; a youngish waft but not an off-putting ethanol or acetone smell. Just an airy manner of freshness and youth. The taste delivers a pepper smack and a playful alcohol jab initially. Enough to widen the eyes and waken the senses. A sweet orange develops with supporting salty, oaky notes. The peat smoke is most prominent at the finish and it is fairly strong - probably another indicator of its youth. The lingering finish is a salty, sweet peat that is mmm-mm-mmm. That's the way to do it. In your face Ledaig 10!