Tastes
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Redbreast 12 Year Cask Strength
Single Pot Still — Ireland
Reviewed April 4, 2021 (edited October 26, 2022)"Great gollywockles this is the finest Irish whiskey I’ve ever encountered. This is liquid gold. Side by side with Redbreast 12 or 15 they don’t hold a candle to this masterpiece. So rich and so full. Everything I could ever want in a whiskey. My whole body is a boner right now. -
It couldn’t possibly be made any cheaper. Cloying thick melted candy meets Dimetapp left in a hot car for two days. The color and the overly fake raspberry mushy flavor might be serviceable as a float on the top of an already ridiculous 20 oz island drink with a beer floating in it upside down or maybe smuggled in your back pack to junior high school dance but other than that I can’t think why you’d want this. I don’t want it. But I’m stuck with it and it sucks. Just like Joe Biden.
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This is a bourbon mans rum. Dorky way to say if you like bourbon the odds are you will like this. It’s distinctly rum but the mouthfeel, the wood sugars, the color even is more reminiscent of a solid straight bourbon. Oh yeah and the 12 years it spent in bourbon barrels probably helps. Not helps. Strike that. Replace “Helps” with “Hath made it so”. Or “hath rendered it thusly”. Or if those English word abominations I offered are far too course and distasteful, make up your own, sheesh, get off my back. I am so overwhelmed lately by all these strawmen who follow me around critiquing everything I write.
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"Easy and pleasant. Lots of banana Runtz on the nose and palate. Borderline sickly sweet though I’m sensitive to that meaning I don’t like it. Unique mash bill and definitely worth pursuing though it’s not for everyone. Must buy at least once. Came highly recommended. But take that with a grain of salt because Joe Biden also came highly recommended and he is a complete shit show. Rule for life: If NPR, CNN, BBC, MSNBC, Reddit, Vice, Washington Post or NYT endorse it, stay as far away as possible.
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Evan Williams Single Barrel Vintage 2010
Bourbon — Kentucky, USA
Reviewed April 2, 2021 (edited December 2, 2022)Inexpensive and I think I know why. Dude this glass bottle is so boring. If you are shallow you won’t be buying this. If you’re a book under the cover judger you might be pleasantly surprised. As far as the juice in the ugly vessel, it’s more diamond than rough. Let me see if I can nail this in one take: Cinnamon fruit cake cornbread wrapped in honey-dipped sun-dried leather strips eaten with fresh hand-carved oaken chopsticks. Yep. That’s what this is like. Anyone tells you otherwise is a liar or at least less imaginative. So if you’ve already done that, by that I mean eaten the cornbread prepared like that and in that manner then there is nothing for you here in the way of new experience unless you’re on the hunt to collect all the Heaven Hill ugly ass bottle club members. Cuz dude that glass bottle is ugly. -
"I go back and forth on this one, but the quota-challenging, narrative-denying American spirit in me won’t allow to go with the grain just so the cool kids won’t shame me on social media. I suppose that makes me sort of an uncommon Patriot....might I say....a Rare Eagle? No. I wont go there. That’s super wack. And I am here to deliver the smack. As in smack down. As in boldly declare Eagle Rare is overrated. I consistently read about its value, scarcity and quality. I’m a buffalo trace fan so it’s hard for me to go against the grain i help establish, but Eagle Rare has some odd unique but indistinct flavor profile I just can’t get behind. It’s not doll but it’s briney and astringent and off-putting. The rest of the experience is great...mouthfeel, initial burst of American bourbony booyah...but that lingering aftertaste makes me wince. 3 different bottles now from 3 different sources drank alongside 3 different wenches under 3 different moons from 3 different vessels while threeing three different threes makes me confident my opinion is now the definitive truth regarding this decent disappointment. I kind of hate myself for even putting this out there because I’m a shameless BT fanboy. Sorry BT. I’ll still recommend it because I have no shame and because I’m supposed to but secretly and also openly it is far from my favorite."
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Glenlivet Founder's Reserve
Single Malt — Speyside, Scotland
Reviewed April 2, 2021 (edited November 11, 2021)"I want to hate this but I dont. I want to be super mean to it but I can’t. It’s not highly interesting and it’s a bit watery. But it’s supposed to be. Once I learned from the brand ambassador in the area it was designed as a gateway glen for cocktails and newbs I had to change tact. For what they claim they set out to do they’ve accomplished. It’s an entry level scotch but the world needs those too and why can’t one of those come from glenlivet? Well ladies, laddies and translexxies, look no further; it just pulled up riding caboose on a banana boat. The flavor...it’s full of bananas! The sensation...it’s full of pleasant! This review....it’s full of terrible! -
The new packaging is great. You have to graduate from beer bottles at some point in your life, we all do. Isn’t that what they say? Isnt what who says? The whiskey...is coming along. This should not have been released yet. The whiskey is too young. Minimum of two years it says, Maximum of two years it is. It’s a bit too sweet and unbalanced. The malt bill carries the day here, much like the beer it’s distilled from however there’s just not quite enough depth to make it worth the money. Yet. Rogue has come along way with their spirits and they are showing strides of improvement and don’t seem to be slowing down. I look forward to when they really get the patience to release some mature fine tuned product."
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Don Julio Blanco Tequila
Tequila Blanco — Los Altos, Jalisco, Mexico
Reviewed April 1, 2021 (edited May 30, 2021)"Very smooth. Price point is a little outlandish as there are several other labels I find to be just as good for half the cost but this is a pioneer and everyone knows it’s name and it’s very enjoyable whether or not you enjoy responsibly or not. Lol responsibly yeah right -
Don Julio Reposado Tequila
Tequila Reposado — Los Altos, Jalisco, Mexico
Reviewed April 1, 2021 (edited August 11, 2022)"Very smooth yet oddly not as good as the blanco. There’s an off flavor I can’t put my finger on or in or around. I’ve been circling around for what feels like hours and still nothing. Can’t place it. Maybe it’s my technique. Maybe I got sidetracked just now. What was I saying? Oh yeah so it’s god some wood tannin thats just a bit bitter and weird. Weird I like, bitter AND weird though? No. Get the fuck out. I’m exaggerating though this is decent but for the price or the label for that matter you can do much better.
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